You Made Me Fall Again, My Friend

But it wasn’t your fault. It was mine.

I mistook your friendship for something more, but it’s okay now. This was a long time ago, and I’ve set myself straight.

I don’t know what it was that made me think the way I did. Maybe it was because I never had such a good straight male friend like you. Yeah, that was probably it.

You were the sweetest person I’ve ever met, and also the funniest.

You would dance circles around everyone else, but you didn’t care that you were horrible at it. I liked that when I was moving, that you would be the first to join in.

You and I shared many guilty pleasures, but something told me that you don’t feel that guilty about loving the things you do. It’s probably because you seem so open.

I used to think that you were a very open person. At least I did, until you opened up about real things for the first time. Deep things.

I liked that you trusted me enough to tell me the things you did.

(For the record, I don’t think that you’re as skeptical about love as you think you are.)

I still don’t know why I read into things. It could have been because I’ve only ever had crushes before, and I never got to know those guys the way I got to know you. You made me so confused for a while there, but I’m better now. I know better.

I was so stupid for thinking there was something else. I should have known when those guys in that BuzzFeed video said, “but if there’s one girl you have a platonic friendship with, it’s Amanda!”

 Thinking about that video makes me laugh, but you made me laugh harder.

You enjoyed watching rom-coms with me, and I liked that. I liked that you also liked to make commentary, because so do I. I’m usually told to shut up, but you joined in on the conversation.

I like that when I surprised you after not seeing you for months on end, how you looked like a child on Christmas morning. You looked so excited, and that made me so happy. I like that you made a bee line to me, and gave me my favorite hug ever in history.

I still like a lot of things about you. Like how instead of judging me on anything, you always listened to my explanations first. And how you would give me honest, constructive criticism when I asked for it.

And when I realized that I never had the urge to kiss you, that’s when I noticed that I didn’t love you in that way. I loved you as a friend. I just really enjoyed your company.

I wish we still hung out, but maybe this is for the best. Thank you for all the good times. I don’t think I will ever forget you.

Prompt: Take the third line of the last song you heard, make it your post title, and write for a maximum of 20 minutes. Go!

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A twenty-two year old who lives through words and her Netflix account. She makes herself laugh more than others, and she claims that she is okay with that.

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