The Thing I’m Craziest About

Okay, so I’ve been holding this subject off, but I may as well as get it done and over with. For a long time, I’ve had this weird obsession with names. I’m not very hush, hush about it, but I do kind of have this superstition with telling people the names that I like so much.

I have an idea as to how this obsession came to be, but I’m not one hundred percent sure if I’m right or not. When I was in middle school (I’m not sure which grade, maybe seventh), I was in the library, looking for a good book to read, when I came across a baby name book.

First of all, why, in God’s name, did a middle school have this book?

Who, in middle school, is naming a baby?

And why did I want to go through this book so badly?

(Plot twist: I don’t know the answer to any of those questions.)

So I ended up signing the book out of the library to take home. I remember first looking for my own name, and finding its meaning (because, you know, that’s how those books work). In case you didn’t know, baby name books are basically dictionaries for names, because as it turns out, an insane amount of people are obsessed with giving their kids names with some kind of meaning.

My parents do not lie among that demographic.

As I’ve mentioned in a previous post, my parents indirectly named me after a character in a TV show they used to watch together. Corny, right?

Well, I can get much cornier. (I guess that’s where I get it from.)

So, I was going through this book, and my first self-assignment was to find the meaning for everyone in my immediate family. I looked up all the meanings for my siblings, my grandparents, my parents, and even my dogs. But something bothered me about the book.

This book had probably about 12,000 names in it, and yet, neither of my parents’ names were present.

So, like any other millennial would, I went to the internet for answers. I wanted answers, and I wanted them ASAP.

The internet was able to tell me what my dad’s name, Heinrich, meant immediately: ruler of the home. And after I told him that, you can bet your bottom dollar that he used this against us kids on so many occasions. But for my mom, MaryEllen, I had to go to the name Mary for an answer. I was annoyed, nonetheless—partially because Mary was most definitely in that book, but also because why didn’t they have a different meaning for her whole first name?

…Teenagers, am I right?

(By the way, Mary has two meanings: wished-for child, and just plain bitter.)

Somehow, this sequence of events made me deeply interested in names. I was kind of interested in baby names for a long time before that (um, someone had to name my dolls), but I became obsessed. And, sadly, I still am. For some random reason, the fever cannot go away.

I’ve had some heated discussions about names, guys. It’s pretty bad. I’ve literally had a fight with my youngest sister, Caitlyn, because she liked the name Emma spelt as Emmah. Who would do that to a child?

(Sidenote: Caitlyn and I have also fought over the custody for the name, Riley. And then my brother and sister-in-law named our niece just that. So that ended our feud. She’s cute, so we’re okay with it now.)

I feel like because I’m actually making this post, that it would be borderline evil to not tell you some of my favorite names. I was really anxious to put this up, and I literally try my hardest to not talk about names with anybody. (But obviously, because I’m me, I slip up.)

Mind you, I have a lot of favorite names. So brace yourself. (Also, I have favorite combinations, but I think I won’t go that far into it today.)

For boys, I like: Alexander, Cory, Dimitri, Ethan, Heath, Henry, Ian, James, Jeremy, Jonathan, Julian, Logan, Mason, Owen, Scott, Sebastian, Vincent, and Wesley, the most.

And for girls, I love: Adrienne, Alexandra, Audrey, Aurora, Charlotte, Darcy, Elise, Elizabeth, Francesca, Genevieve, Isabelle, Julianne, Katherine, Kelsey, Kendall, Lena, Logan, Lucy, Maya, Nova, Quinn, Rowan, Sara, Schuyler, Teagan, Vanessa, Veronica, and Violet.

(I like way more girls’ names than boys’ names, yeah I know.)(And yes, I do see that I clearly put Logan under both boys and girls. It wasn’t a mistake; I like that name for both genders.)

I feel like a lot of people have an ever-changing list hidden somewhere—whether it be in a notebook or their phone—like I do. Others are just better about hiding it. And aren’t crazy obsessed.

And now that you know my list, I’m going to go hide in a black hole for fifteen years.

I guess I feel guiltier about this than I probably should, I don’t know. I feel kind of weird putting that list out to the public more than literally anything else I’ve ever spoken about on here.

Please don’t judge that list to my face.

And enjoy what’s left of the weekend.

I’ll talk to you tomorrow.

Love Always,


Prompt: List your favorite names

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A twenty-two year old who lives through words and her Netflix account. She makes herself laugh more than others, and she claims that she is okay with that.

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