I Love You, I Hate You

Everything about you mesmerizes me.

Like when your eyes widen with excitement;

It feels like lightning striking me, straight into my soul.

And how your smile is perfectly imperfect,

Its signature crooked, in that sexy little smirk…

It excites me.

I love how you always order my drinks for me,

And wrap your arm around my shoulders when I’m cold.

Your body is so warm.

I love the way you touch my scars when we’re laying down,

Your touch soft, filled with love and admiration;

I love how you make me feel like my flaws are a part of a masterpiece.

But one of my very favorite things about you

Is the way you kiss me:

The way you cradle my face, and play with my hair.

It makes me feel safe and wanted and beautiful.

A way I’ve never felt with anyone before you.

God, I love you so damn much—

I don’t ever want to know what life is like after you.

Everything about you annoys the shit out of me.

Like when your eyes would widen with excitement;

And you would leave me, stranded, in the middle of the ocean.

And how your famously known smile

Would send creepy chills up and down my spine…

It freaked me out.

I hated how you always chose what I drank,

And constantly felt the need to enfold me, even when I was sweating.

You made me sweat—a lot.

I hated it when you used to caress my scars, late at night.

All it did was remind me of their presence, and how I got them;

I hate how you actually made me think those scars made me beautiful.

But one of the things that I hated most about you,

Was the way you kissed me:

The way you’d grab my face, and knot up my hair.

It made me feel uncomfortable and messy and submissive.

A way I’ve never felt with anyone before you.

God, I wish I knew better back then—

But at least I got to know what life is like after you.

Prompt: Think up a character. Now, describe that character twice; once to fall in love with them, then again to be repulsed by them.

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A twenty-two year old who lives through words and her Netflix account. She makes herself laugh more than others, and she claims that she is okay with that.

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